“Se wo were fi na wosankofa a yenkyi,”
“It is not wrong to go back for that which you have forgotten.”
I have always been a very wishy-washy person, flitting from one interest to another usually within a maximum of two weeks. I talk about some of that flitting in my post titled, “My Self Portrait”.
One day I was watching the movie Mr. Deeds (if you haven’t seen it yet you must, it is one of Adam Sandler’s best) and I got to the part where he stands up and gets people to talk about what their dreams were when they were children, it was heartbreaking.
I bet that if you asked ten random people what they wanted to do when they were a child and what they do now at least half of the answers will be different. That is not to say that they are not happy, they might be, it is just that often people become so obsessed with “climbing the ladder of success” that they forget to look down and see all of the people, dreams, and adventures they had to push aside in order to get there.
Everyone has an inner child. With some people that fact is very apparent yet others have locked up or hidden away their inner child for so long that they’d have you believe it doesn’t exist.
So I decided to go on a sort of adventure, a quest, to discover what it was that I was good at, liked to do, and had wanted to be as a child. Now let me tell you that while I already knew some of the responses, wow, I was a crazy child and by crazy…I mean mischievous.
My dad told me this story about how I took some bag from some old man and ran around with it & my aunt told me a story about how I called some lady dressed in green the jolly green giant (this wasn’t the first time I had heard this but it never gets old). I was like “…so, I liked messing with people & being honest…I guess not much has changed”
I really was confused, it didn’t seem like this was working. Until I was rummaging around in my room and found a story I had written when I was in 3rd grade. I had wrote it for my a UIL Writing competition, and I had won 3rd place. Sure it had grammatical errors, and was a little confusing to read but it was actually a really good story. It was basically me doing what I do now, pouring out my soul, fictionalizing reality, and crafting a wondrously whimsical story.
So I showed it to my dad and he said…“don’t you remember, you used to write all of the time, whenever you would get mad you would just write that person a letter”. (haha…yeah, I only ever shared one of those letters once…that didn’t go too well) Nonetheless bit by bit I was eventually able to put together a kind of patchwork quilt of who my inner child is: someone who loves to travel, write, express herself, and be herself.
From that point on I vowed to listen to her, we are not the same person, I have experienced too many different things for that to be true. Rather we are more like long lost sisters or bosom friends. She is the better part of myself, the part that keeps me from trouble and guides me in the right direction. I always hear her…in fact most times when I say I am talking to myself, I am really talking to her. It doesn’t mean I’m crazy. (I have always thought it interesting how quickly we are to label what we do not understand as crazy, absurd, or impossible.)
Most times I hear her 24/7 but it is the times when I do not hear her, that I know I have done something wrong. It is times like that in which we must be brave enough to turn back no matter what the consequences.
For as the Sankofa bird knows,
“Se wo were fi na wosankofa a yenkyi,” “It is not wrong to go back for that which you have forgotten.”
So if you don’t hear your inner child, go back and get it.
Also don’t forget to feed your inner child
…they like sweets & playing outdoors.